What People Are Saying
Sandy and I do our very best to raise our kids to live with integrity, power in the world and openness to what is possible. The core values we try to instill in Julian and Ariana are compromised every time we deny who Sandy and I are to each other and every time we diminish what we mean to each other. We will no longer participate in the government’s erasure of our relationship and our marriage. We want our kids to grow up with the courage to step out and step up, even if it is difficult or risky. For us, refusing to lie on our taxes is a straightforward, and pretty minor way to demonstrate that courage ourselves.
As a lawyer and a legal advocate for the LGBT community, I am often in a position to advise people to exercise great caution and to comply in most cases with the letter of the law, even when that means denying who we are. This is my small way of saying, where we can, we are not going to play the game anymore.
I will not lie about who I am. I will not hide from the world.
If we had not LIED when we were in our relationship of 10 years, I would have had enough legal backing (PAPER TRAIL) to prove that we were together for 10 years and been able to collect, at least, well over $60,000 from my ex-partner! She very cleverly, along with her sister, stole my portion of our home's worth and monies I put down toward it ($10,000!). NOT INCLUDING ALL THE MONEY I PUT INTO LANDSCAPING, VACATIONS, FURNITURE, ETC! How they did was even more sinister, and even today I can't believe I fell for it! If we had not lied, I wouldn't have had to financially struggle for the last 6 years and not be out of severe debt for 3 more! How very sad that our very own kind are our worst enemies, because our ex-partners know they can hide behind "STAYING IN THE CLOSET." Here's an important lesson for anyone just getting in a new relationship and purchasing a home, or anything that both of you purchase together - GET IT IN WRITING AND GET IT NOTARIZED!" Even though I knew I should have done this in the first place, because I have a business degree, I listened to my heart and not my brain! It was the biggest, and dumbest financial mistake of my life - bar none! I believed that she would never lie or steal from me, because she works in the criminal justice system in a prison, none the less! Plus, she has a Masters in Criminalogy, so I thought she can be trusted to keep her word! NOT! ALWAYS, GET EVERYTHING IN WRITING AND NOTARIZED AND NEVER, EVER BELIEVE THAT YOUR LOVER WON'T TRY AND SCREW YOU. PEOPLE CHANGE AND NOT ALWAYS FOR THE BETTER AND PEOPLE LIE AND WE CAN NEVER BE SURE - SAD BUT TRUE! BETTER TO SAFE THAN SORRY AND BROKE!!!
This is a great project. However, I do believe tax returns are only a small tip of a huge iceberg relating to how same sex couples are forced to lie. For example, US citizens cannot sponsor their foreign partners to live with them in the US for immigration purposes, therefore couples are forced to live overseas. Many couples who enter the US (ie visiting relatives or on vacation) are forced to lie, that they are married or in a long term relationship, to immigration staff. If they tell the truth immigration think they want to settle in the US therefore will refuse entry to the foreign partner. If couples lie, well that can go on their record and could later be refused entry if they are found out. Many couples just say they are "good friends" which is a term used in the 60s when describing two same sex people in a relationship without saying they are "gay". The US really needs to catch up with society because its becoming more difficult to be a world leader if there are too many restrictions that don't make sense in 2011.
After being married (in a church) 21 years ago... and NEVER being treated as a couple when it comes to filing taxes (and including our fight to gain social security benefits for the surviving partner) it is a nice approach when considering this angle at the issue of swearing the truth under tax form 1040..."Under penalties of perjury, I declare that I have examined this return and accompanying schedules and statements, and to the best of my knowledge and belief, they are true and complete."
Keep it going! Thank you. Good Luck!!!
George and Stephen
After being a couple for now over 21 tears we really want to be treated like all other couples in our USA
George and Stephen
It breaks my heart...partners, children and loved ones are required to lie and dis~honor something so precious between 2 people. Good luck on your efforts..
This movement can pick up a lot more momentum, and supporters, by pointing out the discrepancy of extra taxes for single people as well, straight & queer alike. What organizations can you collaborate with?
My life partner, and now wife, also filed a joint Federal & State return. This will be our 3rd year in a row. So far so good.
So happy to see this movement taking root.
I think that it is a dereliction of responsibility for the federal government to force legally married United States citizens to perjure themselves on an annual basis
It's our time!